the valiant effort to fight the evil trolls within
I didn't sleep well last night...partially because I was fighting myself into not getting so down on myself...how's that for crazy? "Quit, dumping on yourself, dammit!...I mean it!" Actually it's not really like that...I don't talk to myself out loud...it would freak out the dogs. Apparently I'm the only person who thinks about crap like this...or am i? or I'm the only dumbass who admits to it....honesty for me is a fault sometimes...I think I did ok tho'...got up and exercised...go me...so need to do it everyday...I so want this weight off. anyhoo...I then proceeded to get little chores done. All day though I wondered what would happen if I just got brave and admitted how I feel. Part of me thinks this would be fairly sweet gesture on my part but then could end up disasterous...I hate that everything we fear has already happened to us and makes it even harder to overcome. I know alot of this is just me and my stupidity...and I am a babbling idiot in person...but damn...cute! who wouldn't be? and I also know intelligently that this is a completely different person who has exhibited nothing but kindness...and still...I can't play stupid mind games, I'm no good at them anyway.